Why are you sad?

“Why are you sad” were the four most common words of my childhood.

You would expect an 8 year old to be told a “don’t get into trouble” or “don’t fall down the aisle” kinda stuff but not me.

“Why are you sad?”

I am sad because you are stupid. And you are killing my buzz.

On a slightly related note, it’s a pity how people who prefer to be quiet , or introverts as we like to call them, are treated. A million questions a day.

“Are you are right?”

“Were you upset?”

“Don’t you speak?”

“Are you comfortable?”

“Do you speak?”

Yes I do, dear lady. And when I do, I prefer not to sound like a bunch of penny rattling in your bag. It’s a shame how we associate extroverted behavior with magic and fun and at the same time give all our pity to their counterparts who choose to have a quiet time.

( I have been telling this to dimwits all along but for the sake of documentation: its my face. Its genetic! I can’t get a plastic surgery without selling my kidney. So please, either stop hounding me or gather funds to get me one.)

This brings me to another major hazard. Enthusiastic people. I ENVY THEM. Especially now that I see a bunch of shrieking/giggling/ girls around every now and then. Them aside, there’s another kind I envy: the ones with the ability to chatter off into a distance, not realizing the intense amount of pain and migraines they cause to people like me within the earshot.

Yeah, really, I wonder how cool it would be to rattle off in a pitch that high. Sounds completely blissful. Exhibit A:

"Aaaaaaaaaaeeegggggggghhhhh" *shrieks*

“It’s an ant, it’s an ant, it’s an ant!”

“No babe, it’s a red ant! Move away before it lays eggs on your feet!!”

“They do that?”

“Yaw hunh, saw it on that science channel!”  *self applause*

 Growing up is hard.

Growing up if you are quiet is like rigorous imprisonment.

Needless to say, my childhood was more of the latter, owing to the fact that if I spoke, I would be banned from professing my thoughts loudly in front of a gathered public.

Not that much has changed since I was eight but I’ve learnt ( after being advised on various occasions) that it is much better to smile, and I do( even though I have a feeling it makes me look more retarded). But anyhow, I was saying—0h shoot, it’s an ant.

Okkkkkkkkkk. Do I scream???

let’s just wait till it lays the eggs.